Forgotten Society, Part 16


Miguel, Curtis, William, and the others creep in quietly. The GRAND DRAGON (who is extremely large, green, and scaly) is sleeping. Miguel silently instructs everyone to spread out. The dragon’s eyes suddenly open wide. He raises himself up to a menacing level. He lunges for them. People attack him from all sides, but the dragon has the ability to fight them all. Curtis sees the dragon about to crush one person, and he goes to help. Before he gets there, the dragon gets struck in the eye. Curtis sees the wound was dealt by William.


He can’t hurt us if he can’t see us!


Somehow I doubt that.

The dragon regains himself, and the battle continues.


Renee moves among the battlers, searching.


Why don’t you come and fight,

you stupid, cowardly, son of a-!

She gets struck in chest. She falls down on her back.



You pathetic outlaws are no match for

me! Even if you do manage to win this

battle, you won’t have enough people

to fight the Grand Dragon!


Wait, where is that Curtis guy?

And others are missing!


They died.

Daniel laughs. Everyone watches as he stands over Renee.


You sinners just don’t get it! We

have already won! You need to be

controlled for your own good! Why

would you object? Don’t you want

to be free of crime? No, you probably

don’t. That’s the nature of animals. You’re

too late! You will learn to bow to me as I

become mayor then president then king!

Anyone who stands in my way will be taught

a hard lesson. You wanna rape my land? How

would you like it if I did that to you? You

wanna find out? Blonde girl, come here!

Benjamin and Kenneth hold Tiffany protectively.


Submit to me, you bitch!

Right after he says this, a sword pierces right through his crotch. Renee stands up with a sword in her hand.


Who’s the bitch now?

Daniel fights Renee. Tiffany, Benjamin, Trina, John, and the remaining police barricade the rest of Daniel’s guards from getting to Renee. Renee pierces his knee, which makes him fall to his knees. Looking him in his hate-filled eyes, she cuts off his head. Her people cheer. It takes her a moment to register what just happened. She smiles and breathes easier.


Now what?

Renee turns to answer them.


Miguel and his people are losing. Curtis has to hold open the dragon’s mouth so it does not eat him.


Why won’t you die?


Accept your doom!

Suddenly he sees a swarm of police officers storm in. The dragon focuses on them. Renee comes up to Curtis.


You’re alive?


You killed Daniel?


Yes, nice and gruesome! Not in a heroic

Disney-esque way either. How would

your Disney friends slay the-?

Before she can finish her sentence, the dragon grabs her with his claws. Curtis looks at his sword.


Disney did have a dragon. Renee,

you’re a genius!

While the Grand Dragon taunts the others with his captive, Curtis climbs the cave walls.


Hey! Hey! Dragon! Look at me,

mother fucker!

The dragon finally sees him. He stands on his hind legs to get him. Renee is still in his clutches. The dragon starts to lunge for Curtis, but Curtis throws his sword into the dragon’s heart. The dragon roars out in pain. The cave begins to shake, and rocks fall down. Everyone evacuates. The grand dragon forgets about Renee, who tumbles to the ground. Curtis grabs her hand, and they run out of the cave.


When everyone is far enough away, they watch as the tiny dots that are the grand dragon’s eyes move about the cave. The light in his eyes go out, and rocks cover the cave’s entrance. Everything is still for a minute.


Is it over?


For a thousand years.

The thought now sinks, and everyone celebrates. Kenneth finds his children and hugs them tight. Trina finds John, who is holding his hand over a wound on his leg. He straightens up for her, and Trina smothers him with kisses. Curtis picks up Renee and spins her around.


Mother fucker? I love your new

dark side!


I’ve always loved your dark side!

And your wit. And those sexy curves…


Prove it!

He kisses her, and she flings her arms around him and kisses back. William, Miguel, and Tiffany see them and smile.


Curtis, dressed in a tuxedo, sits on the couch and watches the news. It shows John in the delivery room holding his son. Trina lies on the bed,  exhausted but exhilarated.


And in other news, newly instated chief

of police, John Ryo, and his wife, Trina,

welcomed a new son into their life. I

think I speak for all of the DC area

when I say welcome home, little man.

The camera pans back to Tiffany, who is sitting at the news desk.


I’m Tiffany Cartwright.

The camera zooms out to William, who is sitting next to her.


And I’m William Washington. Good night!

The television goes to commercial. Curtis’s attention turns to the bathroom, where emerges Renee, who is wearing a beautiful white dress and light make up. Curtis stands up and goes to her.



Renee turns around and models for him.


I haven’t worn anything non-black

in so long! Do I look ridiculous?


You look amazing!

He grabs her waist.


But if you felt like taking it off,

I won’t stop you!


We’d be late for Mayor Miguel Trebla’s

inaugural ball!


So? He’d understand!

Renee laughs and playfully hits him. They kiss. Curtis shuts off the television. They leave together, arm in arm. Their swords gleam over the doorway. Renee turns off the lights, and the room goes dark.



2 thoughts on “Forgotten Society, Part 16

  1. I really like this whole story. You do a great job establishing and bringing in different characters. I also think where you stop one part and go into the next always leaves a bit of a cliffhanger, which is great. It keeps the reader wanting to know more. Like after they kill Daniel Renee turns to turns to answer John’s “What now” question, but it cuts to the next seen before she answers. The audience knows the answer, but just leaving it, instead of her answering, builds anxiety.You were able to accomplish that with most of your scene cuts.

    I think the only real criticism I would have for it, is it moves really fast. I would like to see, not necessarily more scenes, because I think you have a good amount of fights and calm moments, but maybe longer ones. I enjoyed the parts where they were joking around with each other and I think more on those moments would really make the reader grow even more attached the characters. As for longer fight scenes, I would like to read longer ones, but I think you do a really good job setting up the scene, and giving details and the main action, that the reader (or if translated to film) are able to picture and imagine the rest.

  2. It’s funny cuz I was thinking my scenes were too long so I made them shorter! I’ll keep that in mind, but mostly I figure if it’s turned into a film, the fight choreographer can add some stuff, haha. But I’m so glad you enjoyed this story! I gotta figure out which story I’m going to post next! Thanks for reading 🙂

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