Sabotage, Chapter 10

“I can’t believe we’re doing this!” Carmen grumbled. She stood with her arms folded in front of a chain link fence that guarded a dumpster.

Garith, who had had his arms folded for entirely different reasons, assured her, “I told you, restaurants throw away perfectly good food at the end of the day. I worked in a kitchen in college, and it always killed me to waste so much food. But, for health code reasons, they can’t use old food the next day, so they don’t have a choice. It’s not like it’s rotting. We’ll be fine!”

“I understand that,” Carmen responded. “Although I don’t consider anything coming from the dumpster exactly sanitary, I’m more worried about breaking and entering.”

“Oh, well, I guess technically it would be,” Garith professed. Then, he joked, “Hey, we’re already criminals in their eyes, right?”

Zartex popped up from inside the dumpster. “Actually, I’m the only thief here!” He held up a couple of pizza boxes. “These look pretty untouched!”

As Zartex climbed out of the dumpster bin, Carmen still looked a little unsure. Garith pointed out, “The more we save on food, the less we have to walk!”

Zartex hopped over the fence and handed them the pizza boxes. Garith opened up one of the boxes and Carmen saw that it was a thin crust, cheese pizza. It was hard to tell in the dark, but aside from it being cold, it looked okay. She relented and picked up a slice. “Bon apetit!” She took a bite and half expected it to taste like dirt, but it tasted alright. Actually, it tasted really good! “I can’t believe I’m kind of enjoying this! This has to be the strangest part of our journey!”

Garith practically choked on his food. “This? THIS? Out of all the crazy shit that’s happened, this bothers you the most?”

Before Carmen could reply, they heard footsteps come from across the parking lot. They quickly hid what they were doing and cautiously waited for the perpetrator of  the noise. A voice called out, “What are you doing?”

“Nothing!” Carmen answered with a mouth full of food. She cringed and hoped the person didn’t notice.

The figure stepped under the street light, and it turned out to be a teenage boy in a dark blue football jersey. Carmen, Zartex, and Garith felt relieved since he seemed to be non-threatening. The boy gazed at them in confusion. “Come on! The bus is leaving in a couple of minutes!”

“Bus?” Garith said in surprise.

The boy pointed to across the parking lot. In the distance, they saw a group of people wearing similar jerseys waiting by a bus with a giant yellow cat on it. The boy challenged, “You are cougar fans, right?”

“Cougars are okay, but I wouldn’t call myself a fan,” Garith told him. “I prefer women my own age.”

Carmen hit him gently on the back of the head. “Do you think they have shuttles to go pick up women? Don’t worry, kid, we’re coming.” The kid ran back to the bus, and the other two ogled her quizzically. “They’re heading to the college, which is in the same city we were heading to anyways. We won’t have to walk there. Plus, what are the odds of one of their assassins attending a primarily Mormon school?” They shrugged, grabbed their things, and headed to the bus.

They got on the bus and saw that it was mostly full. Zartex sat next to a young man in the middle. Garith sat next to an older man who sent a quick text and passed out with a very audible snore. Behind both of them, Carmen sat next to a tiny old lady, who greeted her with, “Hello, young lady!”

“Hi,” Carmen replied. She felt so out of place there and hoped no one would discover their secret. She dreaded the idea of getting humiliated and kicked off the bus. Or even worse, if they detained them while they really had nowhere to run. She bean to have second thoughts on this idea.

The old lady pleasantly conversed, “You must be new here. I’m Bette.” She pointed to her name tag.

Bette held out her hand to shake it. As Carmen shook her hand, she had to think of an alibi fast. “Bette, Bette…I’m…Joan.”

“Joan! How funny!” Bette giggled. “I guess we’re supposed to be rivals like Bette Davis and Joan Crawford.”

“I don’t need any more enemies,” Carmen stated truthfully.

Bette laughed, “Is that why you’ve done so much walking?”

Carmen got a jolt of surprise upon hearing this. “How did you know?”

Bette sagely told her, “At my age, I’ve seen it all. We’ve all fallen on hard times. Don’t feel too ashamed. In fact, a lot of the original settlers of Utah came here by foot.”

“I didn’t know that.” Carmen was surprised that this conversation had become mildly interesting. She noted how strange it felt to have someone genuinely be nice to her.

“Oh yes!” Bette went on. “It’s not like it’s easy to get transportation when you’re escaping persecution!”

“Tell me about it.” Carmen hid her grin.

Later on that night, most of the bus was asleep as the driver navigated through the mountain top. The kid sitting next to Zartex gazed at the stars above the treetops. He asked Zartex, “Aren’t they beautiful?”

Zartex looked out the window and replied listlessly, “Reminds me too much of work. The days are getting closer and closer where I gotta go back. I like where I’m at now. My office is so boring!”

“Wow, do you work for NASA?” the boy asked full of wonder.

Zartex, who hadn’t thought of an alias before, clumsily agreed, “Okay, yeah, sure.”

“That’s awesome!” the boy complimented. “I’m studying astronomy myself. I like NASA, but I really wanna prove the existence of aliens.”

That last line got Carmen and Garith’s attention. Zartex, however, did not appear alarmed by it at all. “So, you know a lot about aliens, huh?”

“Oh yes!” the boy gushed. “I know everything there is to know about them! Ask me anything!”

“Okay!” Zartex obviously felt tickled pink about this situation. “Would you recognize if an alien was in your presence?”

“Of course!” the boy replied enthusiastically. “No alien could get past me!”

Carmen and Garith tried to hide their laughter. Zartex could hardly keep a straight face as he told him, “Nah, I think aliens are more clever then you think. Why, one could be right in front of you and you’d never know it!”

The boy argued, “No way! I see where you’re heading with this, and I already know there’s one around us now.” Carmen, Garith, and Zartex sobered up a little after that assertion. “Someone’s been watching us. I noticed a flash on the mountain earlier. This whole bus trip has eyes on us.” Garith and Carmen gave each other a a look that said without words that he may have sensed Mirage watching them. “Something is about to happen. That’s why I’m keeping myself awake.”

Garith and Carmen leaned in the aisle to get close enough to talk. Carmen whispered, “We need to get off this bus!”

Garith said quietly, “We could tell the driver, but I seriously doubt that he would stop on the top of a mountain. Besides, what could they do to us on a bus full of witnesses?”

As if on cue, a loud boom sounded ahead, and the shock waves woke up everyone on the bus. The bus driver slammed on the brakes, lurching everyone forward. The bus stopped, but the driver’s face showed sheer fright. He informed the bus, “The road ahead of us is destroyed, and the ground beneath us is very soft. I’m going to reverse slowly, but while I do, for everyone’s safety, don’t move.” As he reversed, the grave tension on the bus was palpable. Suddenly, the ground behind his rear tires crumbled. The driver quickly moved forward, but now they were stuck on an island!

The bus arched upwards, and everyone held onto the back of their seats, dangling like autumn leaves at the onset of winter. The boy that studied aliens shouted, “See, I told you something would happen!”

“Hey kid,” Garith retorted, “now’s not the time!” He turned to Carmen. “What do we do?”

Carmen tried to think fast. People’s belongings began to slide to the back. Someone’s toddler fell, and Zartex stopped it from sliding to the back. A cell phone slid by Carmen, and as she grabbed it. Her eyes flitted from the phone to Zartex wrangling the baby and back to the phone, which made something click for her. The bus began to slowly slide into the hole, making everyone panic. Carmen held herself up with one hand and held the phone with the other. She held it up to her mouth and commanded, “Okay Google…Play Magic Bus by the Who.”

“You’re joking!” Garith shrieked.

As the music caught Zartex’s ear, they felt the world shift. Carmen grinned broadly as her plan unfolded. They shifted to a new world where the bus became a giant hippie vehicle, and everyone wore outfits from the seventies. The bus driver happily drove through a pink and gold cloud. Zartex played a guitar and sang as the passengers partied behind him:

Zartex:     Everyday I get in the queue
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     To get on the bus that takes me to you.
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     I’m so nervous, I just sit and smile.
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     Your house is only another mile.
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!

Zartex:     Thank you driver, for getting me here.
(Zartex began to sing to the driver)
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     You’ll be an inspector, have no fear.
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     I don’t want to cause no fuss,
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     but can I buy your magic bus?
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Driver:     Nooooo!

Zartex:     I don’t care how much I have to pay!
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!
Garith & Carmen:     I wanna drive my bus to my baby every day.
Garith & Carmen:     Too much, magic bus!

Zartex:     I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it!
Driver:     You can’t have it!

(Zartex turned to the party and sang to them)
Zartex:     Thruppence and sixpence every day
just to drive to my baby.
Thruppence and sixpence each day
‘Cause I drive my baby every way!

(After Zartex put down the guitar, he picked up the driver
and tossed him in the air, causing him to float away.
Everyone else sang as they did this.)
Party Guests:    Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus!
Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus!
Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus!
Magic bus, magic bus, magic bus!

(Zartex sang as he drove)
Zartex:     I said now I’ve got my magic bus!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     I said now I’ve got my magic bus!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     I drive my baby every way!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     Each time I go a different way!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!

(The driver floats back down and begins to
wrestle with Zartex to get his seat back.)
Zartex:     I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it!
I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it!

(The driver gets his seat back, so Zartex
picked up his guitar and sang to the party again.)
Zartex:     Every day, you’ll see the dust!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!
Zartex:     As I drive my baby in my magic bus!
Party Guests:     Too much, magic bus!

As the song fades, the bus arrived at the end of the mountain, and it stopped to let Carmen, Garith, and Zartex out. The rest of the guests keep partying until the world shifted back to reality. Zartex, Carmen, and Garith found themselves on an actual road just outside the forest. The mountain stood behind them, which let Carmen know that her plan had succeeded. The cougar bus chugged away as the passengers pondered how they got out of that but shrugged as to why they didn’t perish. Everyone did but Bette, who stuck her head out the window and gave them a peace sign. They gave one back, which snapped Bette back to reality. She wondered why she did that, shrugged, and returned to her seat.

Garith was the first to speak, “Thank you for not teleporting out to save yourself!”

“I just had a feeling,” Zartex said warmly.

“A lot of them, thank god!” Carmen commented. “If you didn’t have that ability, we would have died!”

Garith complimented Carmen, “Don’t sell yourself short! If you hadn’t thought of it, we would’ve been goners! Good thinking there!”

Carmen felt taken about aback. With all of the bickering they did, she got caught off guard when he said something nice. No hint of sarcasm, he actually looked grateful for her! Before she could respond, a convertible pulled up next to them, and it was a scruffy man in a nice suit who pointed a gun at them. They put up their hands, but they didn’t seem worried. Perhaps it was because their spirits were still high from the emotional overload, or maybe it was due to the fact they had successfully evaded danger several times now, but they actually felt calm faced with this new adversary. Carmen addressed him, “Who told?”

“Let’s just say a little bird told me,” the recovery agent leered.

Zartex concluded, “It was probably that old man sitting next to him. He texted as soon as he saw us.

“We had a rat!” Carmen exclaimed.

“That’s right!” the recovery agent reveled.

“No, there were no rodents on the bus,” Zartex remarked. “There was a cat on the side of the vehicle though.” Carmen and Garith grinned at the assassin’s confused look.

The recovery agent shook his head. He then cocked his gun, ready to fire. “Any last requests?”

Garith noticed some music was softly playing on the radio. “Yeah, can you turn it up?”

He gave them a curious look but complied. Zartex, Carmen, and Garith knowingly smiled at each other and braced themselves for another emotional overload.

 

 

 

Sabotage, Chapter 8

“Look what I found!” Garith held up a dusty red CD player. He trailed behind Zartex and Carmen, all of whom hiked alongside a railroad that ran through a high desert mountainside. The ground was a dark brown and didn’t feel as sandy as they expected. The plants that grew next to the formations didn’t offer a lush landscape but still bore enough foliage that made this route less bare. The mountain itself was smooth and dark brown and gave the added benefit of a nice shadow that cast over the three of them as they walked.

Carmen and Zartex turned to him, and Carmen laughed, “A discman! I haven’t seen those since high school! It reminds me of cheerleading; I used to have one when I practiced routines.”

“Speaking of cheerleading..” Garith, who opened up the CD player, showed Carmen the disc inside. “Gwen Steffani’s L.A.M.B. album!”

“Ooh yeah!” Carmen sang, “A few times I’ve been around that track…”

Garith sang, “…so it’s not just gonna happen like that…”

Carmen and Garith both sang, “…’Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl!” They both laughed.

Zartex chimed in, “I’m familiar with cheerleading but I have not heard of this hall-la-back girl.” He peeked at the CD in Garith’s hand. “Love Angel Music Baby?”

Garith offered, “It looks like the CD player still works. Do you wanna listen?”

“Careful about this,” Zartex warned him. “If I get really into a song, I go into a sensory overload, which will pull anyone around me into my vision. It’s kind of like a music video.”

“Yeah right.” Garith handed him the CD player, and Zartex immediately listened to it. Garith conversed with Carmen, “You were a cheerleader? I thought you did theatre.”

“I only did cheerleading for a year,” Carmen stated. “I took a theatre class freshman year ’cause I thought it would be an easy A. I didn’t think I would fall in love!”

“That makes sense.” Garith shivered a little. “How are you not cold?”

Before Carmen could answer, Zartex started hum and awkwardly dance to song playing. “Wow, I didn’t know aliens could dance!”

“If you call that dancing!” Garith remarked. “Or an alien.”

“Didn’t you see his badge picture?”

“I saw the picture, but…”

“Are you calling me crazy?”

“No, no, no!”

“Do you honestly think I’m so crazy or stressed that I actually bought an insane claim? I saw his face! He can do extraordinary things that we can’t fathom!”

“Excuse me for being skeptical for-”

As a train sped by, the world suddenly stopped and morphed into something entirely new. They found themselves on a high school football field with half of the train passengers on the stands. The mountain still remained on the side of the field opposite of the bleachers. The song “Wind It Up” plays:

High on the hills with the lonely goatherd,                            Zartex, dressed as a nun,

lay-od-lay-od-lay-he-hoo                                                          appeared at the top of the

he yelled back with the girl and goatherd                            mountain and sung this

lay-od-lay-od-low                                                                      stanza.

 

Wind it up!                                                               Carmen, who stood at the head of a

Wind it up!                                                               cheer squad, summoned their

Wind it up!                                                              attention. Garith drummed in a

Yodellay, yodellay, yodel-low!                              marching band that formed around

(Yeah!)                                                                      the field.

 

This is the key that makes us wind up.                           The cheer squad began their

When the beat comes on, the girls line up,                    routine that flows with the

and the boys all look, but no, they can’t touch,             song. The marching band and

but the girls want to know why boys like                     a mascot, a goat, also danced

us so much.                                                            around them. Zartex swayed on

They like the way we dance, they like the                  the mountain.

way we work.

They like the way that LAMB is going ‘cross

           my shirt.

They like the way my pants, it compliments

          my shape.

They like the way we react every time

         we hear the…

 

Every time the bass bangs, realize it                           Zartex sang these lyrics.

it calls your name.

Let the beat wind you up and don’t

          stop ’til your time is up!

(Get in line now!)

 

Wind it up!                                                          The crowd, the band, Zartex, and the

Wind it up!  (C’mon)                                          cheerleaders all sang the chorus.

Wind it up!

Yodelay, yodelay, yodel-low!

 

You’ve got to let the beat get under your skin.                  Zartex sang this part.

You’ve got to open up and let it all in.      

But see, once it gets in, the popping begins,

then you’ll find out why all the boys stare.

 

See, they’re trying bite our style,                                       Carmen and the cheerleaders

they try to study our approach.                                         sang this part.

They like the way we do it, so original.

I guess they are slow, so they should leave the room.

This beat is for the clubs, and the cars go-

 

Every time the bass bangs, realize it calls                          Zartex sang this part.

your name.

Let the beat wind you up and don’t stop

            ’til your time is up!

(Get in line now!)

 

Wind it up! (When you’re ready)                                     Everyone sang this part.

Wind it up!

Wind it up!

Wind it up!

Yodelay, yodelay, yodel-low!

 

This is your moment. (Uh huh)                                       Zartex sang as every cheerleader

Come on, girl, you know you own it.                             but Carmen did a floor routine.

(Uh huh) You know your key is still                              The cheerleaders sang the words

  tick-tocking,                                                           in parentheses.

(Hell yeah) but you know they’re watching.

 

Get it, girl, get it girl, get it girl!                                   The cheerleaders pose on the floor.

Get it girl, get it girl, get it girl!                                   Everyone but Carmen sang as she

To the floor, to the side, to the back,                         did a solo.

but don’t let him ride.

Keep going, girl, it’s your night!

Don’t let him steal your light!

 

I know he thinks you’re fine and stuff,                       Zartex sang this part as Carmen

but does he know how to wind you up?                     finished her solo.

(C’mon)

 

Wind it up!                                                                    The cheerleaders got up, and

Wind it up!                                                                    everyone went back to singing

Wind it up!                                                                    and dancing.

Wind it up!

Yodelay, yodelay, yodelay, hey!                                As the song ended, everyone on the

field posed together, and the crowd

cheered.

 

After the song was over, the world shifted back into its original shape. The train, while a little farther than where it was before the song, continued on its way. Zartex, Carmen, and Garith, who were also further than they were before, still stood in the poses they had at the end of the song and started to become more cognitively aware, as if they got pulled out of a trance. Zartex scaled down the mountain. Garith figured out he didn’t have any drums in front of him and stopped motioning his hands like he was still playing the instrument. Carmen realized she stood in a way where she was doing a half split and winced as she got back up.

Carmen figured out pretty quickly that his phenomenon must have been the sensory overload that Zartex warned her about. This discovery made her calm down a bit, but Garith was still freaking out. “What just happened? Why did the world flip like that? How? Why?…”

Zartex jumped back onto the desert floor. “The energy beamed from my emotions and manipulated the environment around me. For a moment, my surroundings absorbed my energy and became part of my vision. I don’t think humans fully understand how powerful one’s energy can be!”

“I get what you’re saying,” Carmen opinionated. “Vibes can be felt and measured. Like, when I would go to certain houses, once in a while, I would get a bad feeling. Or, if someone is in a good mood, it rubs off on you and you can feel it too. I guess our intuition can measure frequencies our body can’t!”

” How come no one on the train is freaking out?” Garith probed.

Zartex informed him, “They just have a lapse in memory, like a mini blackout. You two remember the experience because I told you about it beforehand.”

“Lucky me!” Garith said sarcastically.

“Now, don’t go publishing about an alien’s presence on your news site!” Carmen warned him.

“I know that!” Garith snapped. “I’m a reporter for the world news, not a gossip rag!” He paused for a moment and apologized, “Sorry! I didn’t mean to yell. I’m sure you understand why I’m freaking out. How did you react when you found out?”

“I was too stunned to move let alone comprehend it all,” Carmen related. “Once I did figure it out, I just kind of went with it. Everything happening around me was so crazy that I guess an alien was the least of my problems!”

Zartex exclaimed, “Boy, that was fun! We got a little farther ahead with very little effort on our parts! We should do this the whole way there!”

“Please don’t!” Garith requested.

Zartex tried to play the CD but it wouldn’t even turn on. Carmen told him, “The batteries probably died.”

“Good!” Garith requested.

Carmen grinned. “Party pooper!”

Garith reacted fervently, “You call this a party?”

 

 

Turning 30, Chapter 12

Cera, Will, Ashlynn, and Feliz sat a table for six in a busy karaoke bar. They sat in the back area, which could not quite call it a balcony because it was low enough to the ground, but it was a little more elevated than the rest of the bar. The bar had a fairly large stage with colorful lights, and the DJ sat on the side of the stage. The crowd was very diverse in terms of age, race, and social status. Cera, Will, and Ashlynn were not paying attention to any of it because Feliz was upset.

Cera asked incredulously, “You slept with her? Why would you do that?”

Feliz replied, “I still want to be a good husband until I tell her. I will tell her, but I panic every time I think about it.”

“Is there ever a right time?” Ashlynn pondered. “I mean, life decisions are never really easy to make, and it’s not like the heavens will move and deliver a clear message of when it’s time. The longer you wait, the harder it’ll be. At some point, you have to choose your own happiness above any expectations. Stop suffering like this, bite the bullet, and just do the thing you’re afraid of!”

Feliz considered her words but did not look sold yet. “It’s going to break her heart. And my family’s. I’m not ready to make that kind of impact yet.”

“Dude,” Will offered, “next time she’s in the mood, turn off the lights and let me do her. As your friend, it’s the least I can do.”

Feliz replied sarcastically, “What a noble sacrifice!”

Cera joked, “Don’t go acting like a sad sap. We already have that position filled by Tadd!”

“So, until Tadd is cured, we can’t have any emotional problems?” Feliz probed.

“No!” Cera, Ashlynn, and Will answered in unison. The four of them laughed.

At that moment, Lavena found their table. She guided Tadd there by linking arms. She sat Tadd down and looked at the stage in disgust. A young man was singing a Justin Bieber ballad. Lavena commented, “How are we supposed to cheer him up with this crappy music? What’s the name of the chick that originally sang this song?”

Cera told her, “Justin Bieber.”

Lavena blushed a little. “Oh! I was thinking it was the Hannah Montana girl.”

Will remarked, “This is what pop music has come down to? Our generation idolized pure talent. What is this? When did it at all change? Like, when did our baggy jeans get replaced with skinny jeans? Now suddenly it’s considered macho to wear make up and rock the man bun. What happened to pop culture? Actually, guys, when did we become uncool?”

The song ended, and the crowd politely applauded for the young man, who took a bow and left the stage. A karaoke host came onto the stage and spoke into the microphone, “Alright, thank you Skylar! Up next, we have a very special performance from a hip young cat, Jerry!”

As the karaoke host stepped offstage, Jerry stepped out. Jerry dressed very young but was clearly in his thirties. He took the microphone and before the music started, he announced, “This song is dedicated to that very lovely ginger in the back.” Jerry pointed to the back, and a spotlight shined on Lavena. Lavena cringed while Ashlynn, Cera, Feliz, and Will looked amused. Tadd definitely looked out of place with his stoic face. The music for “The Mammal Song” came on, and that just heightened everyone’s feelings.

Jerry was very into his performance as he sang:

“Ha ha, well now we call this the art of mating,
but there are some very important differences
between human beings and animals that you should know about.”

Lavena looked embarrassed, but Ashlynn, Feliz, Cera, and Will stopped paying attention to her because they were festively dancing and singing along.

Jerry continued singing,

“I’d appreciate your input.
Sweat baby sweat baby, sex is a Texas drought.
Me and you do the stuff that only Prince would sing about.
So put your hands down my pants and I bet you’ll feel nuts.
Yes I’m Siskel, yes I’m Ebert, and you’re getting two thumbs up.
You’ve had enough of the two hand touch, you want it rough.
You’re out of bounds.
I want you smothered, I want you covered like my Waffle House hash browns.
Come quicker than FedEx, never reach apex, just like Coca-Cola stock.
You are inclined to make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time.

Do it now.
You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals,
So let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.
Do it again now.
You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals,
so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.
Get horny now!”

The music abruptly stops. Ashlynn, Cera, Feliz, and Will were in mid-dance and look disappointed. Lavena, who was thoroughly irritated by this dedication to her, dryly snapped, “Act your age!”

Will responded with a question, “How exactly do we do that?” Lavena tried to spea, thought about it, and silently agreed that he had a point.

The karaoke host got on stage and took the microphone from Jerry. “Okay, when we agreed to dedicate a song to someone, we didn’t know that it’d turn into sexual harassment. Mike, you said it was a romantic song!” He glared at the DJ, who just shrugged. “Sorry, ma’am. Management says that a round of drinks is due at your table with our deepest apology.” Ashlynn, Cera, Will, and Feliz cheer at that. When the host tried to kick Jerry off the stage, Jerry does the “call me” sign to Lavena, who responded by staring daggers at him. He pointed to Ashlynn and silently asked if he could call her. Ashlynn laughed and shook her head. Cera looked hopeful, but the karaoke host literally shoved him off the stage. He collected himself. “Next up, we have…Tadd!”

Lavena, Cera, Ashlynn, Will, and Feliz all stared at Tadd in shock. Tadd unenthusiastically picked himself up and walked to the stage. Tadd had a despondent demeanor as he took the microphone. He sadly told the crowd, “This is dedicated to Brie, wherever you are…” The music for “I Drive Myself Crazy” by N’Sync played, and the other five exchange looks of concern and confusion.

Tadd sang,

“Lying in your arms, so close together,
didn’t know just what I had.
Now I toss and turn ’cause I’m without you,
how I’m missing you so bad.

Where was my head, where was my heart?
Now I cry alone in the dark!

I lie awake, I drive myself crazy,
drive myself crazy thinking of you.
Made a mistake when I let you go, baby.
I drive myself crazy wanting you the way I do.”

Tadd started to bawl. Will, Feliz, Lavena, and Cera shake their heads in disappointment. Ashlynn looked on edge. She could tell what was coming, and she got up and started to head towards the stage. The other four looked at her questioningly. The crowd was encouraging him to continue.

“Come on Tadd!”

“You can do it!”

The crowd clapped and cheered sympathetically. Someone whistled, and Ashlynn turned to her friends to silently say that was why she was heading to the stage. The other four headed down to help her. Tadd’s tantrum was a little softer than it had been in the past, but the audience did not know that. The y stared at him in confusion and little disgust. Ashlynn reached the stage first, and she stooped to pick up his arm and hoist him up. The karaoke host gave her a blank stare, and smiled awkwardly. “How about we rain check those drinks?”

She giggled nervously. Lavena, Cera, Feliz, and Will got onstage to help her. As they led the flailing Tadd off the stage, Lavena spoke to the crowd, “He’s making progress, I swear!”

The audience did not respond. As they exited, Jerry got back on stage and commented, “Man, I can’t believe she’s going home with that guy!”The karaoke host shook his head, and they prepared to continue as if nothing had happened.